What do you notice when you go after love? When you please, want to be liked, need to belong and feel accepted, and/or seek approval? In other words, what do you notice when you come from need?
When you are in the thick of accommodating, bending, complying, and giving from the place of need, how do you feel? What are the sensations in your body? Place your hand on your heart - is it expansive or contracted? How high is your energy? How authentic are you behaving? Do you tell the truth about what you feel?
The identity of 'me' that is wanting something from 'other' is a rocky ride. You feel separate. Your emotional state is like a leaf in the wind as you are reactive to what others say or do. You can feel angry, frustrated, hurt, disappointed, ungrounded. Or you can simply shut down. You are asleep to your essence, that which you already are - the divine spark of spaciousness/peace/stillness/love that is the context of your life.
Make the intention to be aware of pleasing. When you are connected to your true nature, beyond the identity of 'me', the awareness of what you are experiencing is compassionate and loving. There is an opportunity to play with this aspect of the personality and risk disapproval. Magic happens without any mental effort or striving on your part as you loosen the mind's grip.
© 2009 Jeannie Campanelli, Inner Confidence Coaching. All Rights Reserved.