Connecting for Real

I had the privilege of leading a couples retreat last month  a powerful experience that impacted those who participated, including myself.

Men and women. The inner masculine. The inner feminine. Different styles. Different ways of perceiving the world. These men and women came together to look past their own points of view that can result in a sense of separation and disharmony.

Looking into the eyes of their partner. Listening. Appreciating. Dancing. Being together. Committed to each other. Realizing that, in the mutually held gaze, there is no difference between the gazer and the one who returns the gaze.

It was beautiful to witness the willingness of these couples as they opened to a deeply felt sense of longing for connection, love, peace, and fulfillment. This longing is ripe with possibility. It opens the heart to what’s here now, and touches the soft spots, our own vulnerability.

Time together spent truly connecting, in itself, creates an opening for greater freedom and love that is overflowing from our own heart rather than sought after from another.

This is what is available for all of us when we slow down and simply 'be' together, without the distractions of our everyday lives. Without all the 'have-to's' and 'shoulds'; those responsibilities that push us to focus 'out there' instead of within.

Each participant is back to regular life now - in which there are challenges in making the time to connect.  Our significant relationships become especially challenging when they fall into the habit of solely existing in the 'doing' place of problem-solving, planning, mind meeting mind.

When we choose to turn attention inward, Love/Life takes care of any problem, any issue, in magical ways.  There is a time for everything. Joy. Anger. Love. Hate. All feelings can pass through in their own time and way.  There truly is no right or wrong.  No good or bad. It is all to be welcomed as part of the human experience.

When partners turn inward together, 'me' and 'other' can disappear, and two can merge into One.

Set time aside to simply rest, with nothing pressing to do - even it's for five minutes once a day.

Breathe. Be with the space between the in-breath and the out-breath. Become aware of the body. Be with the places of tension and the places of relaxation, without attempting to change what you discover. Feel the source of Love that resides within you. Listen to your heart. It is all welcome.

From the Love that is within you, reach out to your partner. Share a long hug. A loving touch. A deep look into their eyes.  Notice how good it feels to simply and deeply share the Love that always is - with another.

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© 2009 Jeannie Campanelli, Inner Confidence Coaching. All Rights Reserved.