The word, confidence, comes up a lot in our culture. It's at the core of the work that I do through my writing, coaching, and leading of retreats. It's been the biggest piece of my own personal journey.
What I now see is that confidence is essentially founded upon a concept of the mind that has its own frequency, vibration, atmosphere. It is essentially an experience. Such beliefs as 'I'm not good enough', 'something is wrong with me', 'I know it all', 'I'm less than', or 'I'm better than' are all examples of thoughts which influence whether confidence is present or lacking.
In my work, people come to me because there is a lack of what I call inner confidence. Instead of trying to alter a client's lack of confidence, I support s/he to actually experience what's there. This includes the resistance to feeling what is present.
It is not satisfying to fully experience a lack of confidence without changing it because the mind likes results. The reality is that the experience of lacking confidence melts away into Presence when it is deeply and truly felt. In Presence, there is a natural, effortless confidence that is not fabricated or cultivated. It is our natural state.
In other words, inner confidence is not about gaining something. What is really happening is an inhibition to the natural flow of life. There is a block to Life. Natural confidence that resides deeply within us when we rest into peace/stillness/spaciousness is always, always present. From this natural state, our gifts can flow.
Begin to notice when a sense of confidence is present and when it is not. Instead of resisting the discomfort of feeling a lack of confidence, welcome it like you would a child or pet that you love. Notice what happens.
© 2009 Jeannie Campanelli, Inner Confidence Coaching. All Rights Reserved.
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Jeannie Campanelli, Ed.D, CPCC, is a coach and author who partners with naturally-giving men and women who place other people’s needs in front of their own. As a consequence, they are disconnected from themselves. Jeannie offers a free e-newsletter titled “Notes on Claiming Your Life as Your Own” to support you in feeling the serenity, vitality, and wholeness that comes from inner confidence. When you subscribe, you will receive gifts to support you in this journey home to yourself, including an e-course from “The Inner Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Claiming Your Life as Your Own” written by Jeannie. Visit www.innerconfidencecoaching.com